Two week wait

The ‘two-week wait’ – The 3 things I did to get through it…

Anyone who has gone through the two-week wait will tell you that these 336 hours are nothing short of excruciating. For those not familiar with the phrase, the #twoweekwait is the window between ovulation and your expected period. It’s the time when all the Am-I-pregnant anxiety, worry and frustration emerges! During this time, you can’t stop living your ‘normal’ life but at the same time you don’t want to risk a negative impact on what could be happening inside you. The other challenge, I found, is that I wanted to appear like there was nothing unusual happening in my life. Whilst in actual fact there was potentially something VERY unusual happening in my life! As usual, I decided the best way to cope whilst #ttc (trying to conceive) was to make a plan…

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Sperm swimming towards the egg

The First Try…

The month before I was due to undergo my first round of Intrauterine Insemination (IUI) I began a new work contract which was perfect timing as the job allowed me to top up my income once more. As previously mentioned, I believe working as a marketing contractor has enabled me to be in more control of a decent work life balance, which is something that I continue to be grateful for. Up to now I’ve had the opportunity to ‘live life to the max’ and I can say with certainty that, as a result of this, I now feel ready to pause that life and try and create a new life…

And so, the next phase of this journey begins.

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Keep calm

The final countdown

March 2018

Decision made, I am going to do this…


Fertility MOT booked for 6th May – This test will help me to understand my ability to conceive. As I have already had my eggs frozen it will be useful to understand whether my fertility status has ‘fallen off a cliff’…

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Advance to go

Advance to GO…

I have spent a lot of time looking ahead and planning for the future in both my business and my personal life. In the summer of 2017, with the realisation that I would rather be happy by myself than have a child with the wrong man, I recognised that quite a lot in life is down to luck and chance rather than design. Furthermore, I really believe that in order to let new things happen in your life it’s important to let go of some of the old stuff. In my case the ‘old stuff’ was understanding that maybe there was another way and that I didn’t need to keep chasing after the ‘norm’.

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The way forward

In the autumn of 2015, I experienced what I guess some people would call ‘burn out’. My 9 to 5 corporate job in London had turned into a 7 to 9 Monday to Thursday. On Fridays I would manage to escape to yoga at 6 for good behaviour! I was not enjoying most aspects of the job I was doing: endless pointless meetings, continuous death by PowerPoint presentations plus the tedium of the daily commute. I had reached a place I didn’t want to be, and I wanted out!

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Nepalese mountain view and prayer flags

Soul Searching

I believe I began the ‘soul searching’ that led to becoming a single mother by choice whilst I was going through the egg freezing process. As I mentioned, it was the first time I became truly aware of my potentially dwindling fertility. Despite this, I didn’t make my decision quickly. I would say the time frame from it being just an idea to making the decision and selecting the sperm took me about four years. So, it has been quite a long road I have travelled in the journey towards becoming a single mother.

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Frozen eggs

Not your average egg hunt…

2015 – Egg freezing diary

Thursday 2nd July – Initial consultation with the consultant Obstetrician and Gynaecologist (£200). He said the same as the talk Kate and I went to in May: time is not exactly running out but the sooner I get ‘cracking’ the better. He also said that if timings work for me then I could go ahead as soon as next month. Eggcellent! 

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Ice ice baby

Ice Ice Baby!

The initial idea to ‘crack on’ and freeze my eggs actually came from my Mum. However, it was not a decision to be taken lightly and there was a lot of research to be done. At this stage of my life with nothing to tie me down, and after the heart-breaking end of the relationship with Mr SP, I took a break from my career and once more set out for ‘far off lands’. This gave me a valuable opportunity to do some BIG thinking whilst visiting friends and family on the other side of the world.

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Emma takes a leap

Once upon a time…

Once upon a time there was a young girl called Emma who had a lovely, lucky life. She lived in a beautiful house in Berkhamsted. Everything was ‘normal’. She had a loving Mummy and Daddy who got on really well. She also had a smaller sister and a rabbit called Thumper. (I know, almost Disney perfect, right?!)

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